When you’re in a relationship, it’s not unusual to wonder if your sex life might fade. That heady thrill of first discovering each other’s bodies can’t last forever, right?
Well, here’s the truth: your sex life will definitely change over time. But it doesn’t have to become stale, so long as you’re open to exploring together. Couple’s sex toys are one of many ways to share pleasure and a playful connection with your partner – whether you’re long-term, newly married, or even navigating long-distance love.
In this guide, you’ll find out all the different types of couple’s sex toys and their benefits. You’ll also get expert tips on how to choose, use, and care for your toys.
Experience the thrill together: Shop sex toys for couples
Couple’s toys in a nutshell…
- Couple’s sex toys might make you feel more connected. Research shows that novelty and open communication boosts relationship and sexual satisfaction.
- There are lots of types to explore… from couple’s vibrators that can be worn during sex to app-controlled toys for long-distance play.
- Consider factors like material and cost when choosing a toy. High quality sex toys are made from non-porous materials like body-safe silicone. They might cost more but won’t need replacing as often, especially if you take proper care of them (more on this below).
- When playing for the first time, start slow, stay curious. Talk to your partner about your boundaries and desires, use lube, and choose positions suited to your toys. The first time you try using a toy together, it might be a little awkward, but don’t let that stop you. Practice makes perfect!
- Keep toys clean and well-cared for. Wash your toy after sex using mild, unscented soap or dedicated sex toy cleaner. Store in separate bags to prolong its life.
Curious to learn more? Keep exploring the full guide for more detailed tips and advice from Dr. Shamyra Howard, a relationship therapist and sex expert.
5 reasons to love using sex toys as a couple
Being curious about sex toys is great news for your relationship, and using toys with a partner doesn’t mean you’re less attracted to or satisfied by each other.
“Sex toys are there to enhance the sexual experience with your partner,” Dr. Shamyra Howard explains. “It’s a companion, not competition.”
Later, you’ll discover tips for talking to your partner about sex toys. For now, here are the key benefits of using sex toys with your partner:
1. It brings novelty to your sex life
Whether it’s a rumbly wand massager gliding over erogenous zones or wearable couple’s toy that stimulates you both during penetration, sex toys make it easy to bring novelty into your routine. “Erotic variety” (aka novelty in your sex life) is linked to arousal and relationship satisfaction, which means exploring new sensations with toys could help you feel sexier and more satisfied in the long run.
2. It can help open lines of communication about sex
Research shows that open communication about sex is directly linked to both sexual and relationship satisfaction. Being open about sex, even with your partner, can be daunting. “While people are having sex, they’re not always talking about it!” says Shamyra. “But the more you talk about sex, the better sex you have.”
Discussing how and when to use couple’s sex toys encourages you to really talk to your partner about sex; exploring what feels good, what doesn’t, and what you’d like to try next.
3. It can offer deeper, shared pleasure
Sex toys offer sensations you can’t replicate just with your bodies. “Sex toys have motors, right?” explains Shamyra. “There are no motors in your body; your tongue can’t go as fast as a sex toy; genitals can’t vibrate!” When you share that intense, sensual experience with a partner, it can bring you even closer together.
Some couple’s toys, like We-Vibe Chorus Pro, can be inserted into the vagina and worn during sex, offering deep G-spot vibrations that simultaneously stimulate the penis as it thrusts inside. That way, you both get to experience heightened arousal. They’re called “couple’s toys” for a reason—there’s something it in for everyone.
4. It can help couples with mismatched libidos
5. It may even boost wellbeing
When you and your partner are thriving, your sex life is more likely to thrive with you. Sex toys may help with that, depending on the individual. Vibrators in particular have been shown to improve sexual function, pelvic health, and even mood in women.
Similar effects have been observed for people of all genders who integrate toys into partnered play. Research also shows that one of the things that distinguishes the most sexually satisfied couples from the least is that the happiest ones are using toys and incorporating other forms of novelty into their sex lives.
Explore something new together: Shop sex toys for couples
Types of sex toys for couples
Wearable toys — like a penis ring
Wearable toys fit discreetly inside underwear or against the body. Some toys, like penis rings, can be worn during sex, which means you both benefit from the sensations. You can usually play hands-free too, which allows for intimate caresses and easy position changes. “With wearable toys, you can stay present with each other and enjoy that shared experience,” says Shamyra.
Couple’s vibrators — like a magic wand
Couple’s vibrators come in a few shapes and sizes. “One of my all-time favorites to recommend is a wand massager,” says Shamyra. “Like most toys—and sex in general—wands aren’t just for genitals, they’re for full body.” Wands can be used for massage to relax and release tension before sex, or to tease erogenous zones like the nipples, perineum, penis, or clitoris.
Remote-control toys — like a panty vibrator
Remote-controlled and app-enabled vibrators let you hand power over to your partner. For example, you might enjoy wearing a panty vibrator while your partner controls the intensity and teases you from across the room.
Long-distance toys – like an app-controlled clitoral suction toy
When you’re apart, long-distance toys let you share pleasure across continents and build anticipation for your next visit. On the We-Vibe store, look out for the “app-enabled” symbol to see which toys can be used long-distance.
Imagine enjoying the sensual feeling of a clitoral stimulation toy while on the phone to your lover. With the app, your partner can take over and edge you to orgasm with different vibration patterns and even video chat while syncing the sensations to your moans.
Chorus Pro
We-Vibe Wand 2
We-Vibe Pivot
We-Vibe Sync O
We-Vibe Moxie+
We-Vibe Jive
We-Vibe Verge
We-Vibe Sync Lite
How to choose the right couple’s sex toy
Materials and safety
Always choose non-porous materials like high quality silicone, stainless steel, or borosilicate glass — they’re hypoallergenic, body-safe, and easy to clean. Avoid toys made from porous jelly or rubber that may contain phthalates. Waterproof or water-resistant toys simplify cleaning and let you play in the shower or bath.
Noise-level and design
If discretion matters, look for quiet, rumbly motors rather than buzzy ones. Ergonomic handles and flexible arms will fit different bodies more comfortably. Pick a toy with various vibration intensities and patterns if you want a more personalized experience.
“Also, choose a sex toy with intuitive controls,” adds Shamyra. “You don’t want to be fumbling around mid-play trying to find the right setting.” If you’re a sex toy beginner, smaller vibrators or clit-sucking toys with two-button controls are the easiest to get the hang of. If you’re completely new to toys, start with the lowest intensity setting and gradually increase as needed until you find your pleasure zone.
Compatibility with sex positions
Consider how you like to move. Wands are amazing couple’s toys, but they may be too bulky if you like close, sensual sex positions like Missionary. You might prefer using a small bullet vibrator or wearable couple’s vibrator.
Wearable couple’s toys like the We-Vibe Sync 2 are inserted into the vagina and worn during sex. The flexible arm stays pretty secure inside you during any position, but you’ll find more advice on which sex positions work best below.
Budget and quality
Higher-end toys tend to offer stronger motors, high-quality materials, and better battery life. Rechargeable toys are also more sustainable and convenient, since you don’t have to keep buying batteries.
Stick to reputable retailers that prioritize safety and warranties, such as We-Vibe, Womanizer, or Lovehoney. These brands do extensive user testing and have years of experience in designing toys that really feel amazing to use.
5 of the best sex toys for couples
- We-Vibe Chorus Pro. The ultimate wearable couple’s toy with a haptic feedback remote that lets you and your partner “feel” each other’s pleasure.
- We-Vibe Wand 2. A powerful wand massager with a broad stimulation head for external pleasure anywhere on the body.
- We-Vibe Pivot. A comfortable penis ring that delivers vibrations for both partners. Some people find penis rings help them stay harder for longer, too.
- We-Vibe Moxie+. A sleek panty vibrator for public play or teasing at home. Just slip it into your favorite lingerie and hand the controls over to your lover.
And just because you’re playing with a partner, that doesn’t mean you can’t use your favorite clitoral suction toy or prostate massager. Masturbating together can help you understand each other’s bodies and pleasure even better.
How to introduce toys to your relationship
If you’re hesitant to bring up sex toys with your partner, that’s not unusual. “Sometimes there’s stigma attached to toy use with couples,” says Shamyra. But using toys together can heighten arousal and make sex more satisfying.
The key is being able to have an open conversation about it—and it’s normal if that feels a bit vulnerable. “You have to ask the question,” says Shamyra. “If you’re okay having sex with someone, you should be okay talking about sex with them!”
Here’s how she recommends getting the conversation going:
- Lead with curiosity. You don’t have to persuade your partner to buy a toy right away. Instead, gauge how they feel with questions like: How do you feel about using sex toys? What about with a partner?
- Address embarrassment. Acknowledging that you find the conversation awkward or difficult can break the ice; it shows your partner that you’re willing to be vulnerable with them and might encourage them to do the same.
- Give examples. It’s easier to work out how you feel about something if you have a reference point. Mention social media trends or scenes in books and films, e.g. I saw someone on TikTok talk about this new sex toy, can I show it to you?
- Discuss boundaries. Once the conversation is flowing, you can dig deeper to explore each other’s boundaries, e.g. I’m curious about external stimulation but I don’t want anything insertable just yet, what do you think?
How to use couple’s sex toys
Choose toys together
Treat it like foreplay. Browsing toys together can build anticipation as you get excited to try something new. If you’re a beginner, just get one or two simple, affordable toys (you can expand your collection as you work out what you’re into).
“[And] set realistic expectations,” Shamyra reminds us. “Sex toys aren’t therapists—they’re companions that enhance connection, they won’t fix it.”
Get to know your toys
Use lubricant
Always use water-based lube with sex toys—it makes friction feel slick and sensual rather than irritating on your sensitive skin. Water-based lubes will also help preserve the longevity of your toy.
Prepare your body even further for pleasure by getting relaxed and turned on first; dim the lights, add music, and bring out a massage oil or candle. This ritual signals to your body that it’s time for connection and helps to cultivate a relaxed mood.
Experiment with scenarios
“Don’t take a wearable vibrator out on date night the first time you use it,” Shamyra says. “Make sure you’re comfortable using them and you know how it feels for each person involved.”
That said, when you are confident with your toy, you might enjoy planning a “toy night” where you explore something new together, whether that’s a role play scenario at home or playing with a panty vibe during a romantic dinner.
Clean your toys straight after
What’s the best sex position for wearable couple’s toys?
Missionary (with a twist)
Spooning
Cowgirl
How to clean and care for your toys
Cleaning
Most toys can be easily washed after every use with a mild, unscented soap or dedicated sex toy cleaner. Be sure to check the manufacturer’s instructions, as your toy may not be fully waterproof. Pat your toy dry with a lint-free towel.
Storage
Lubricant compatibility
Battery and charging care
When to replace toys
Sharing sex toys
Not sure if sex toys are right for your relationship?
You might not feel ready to choose a couple’s sex toy just yet. The important thing is that you’re exploring new sensations and experiences with your partner, however that looks for you.
That said, sex toys can offer intense pleasure. They also offer more ways to feel playful and connected in your relationship, so don’t be afraid of exploring. Start with small, affordable toys and keep talking about your boundaries and desires as you work out what feels amazing for both of you.
Discover what’s possible: Shop sex toys for couples
- McNulty, J. K., & Fisher, T. D. (2019). Encouraging erotic variety: Identifying correlates of, and strategies for promoting, sexual novelty in romantic relationships. Personality and Individual Differences, 146, 65–75
- Montesi, J. L. et al. (2010). The specific importance of communicating about sex to couples’ sexual and overall relationship satisfaction. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 28(5), 591–609.
- Hald, G. M., Pavan, S., & Øverup, C. S. (2025). Do sex toys make me satisfied? The Journal of Sex Research, 62(5), 735–749.
- Dubinskaya, A. et al. (2024). The role of vibrators in women’s pelvic health. International Urogynecology Journal, 35, 1085–1092.
- Frederick, D. A., Lever, J., Gillespie, B. J., & Garcia, J. R. (2017). What keeps passion alive? Sexual satisfaction is associated with sexual communication, mood setting, sexual variety, oral sex, orgasm, and sex frequency in a national US study. The Journal of Sex Research, 54(2), 186-201.
